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I Think I'll Keep Him

I just went in to see John, who is sitting comfortably at his favorite place - the end of the kitchen table, to tell him not to worry. There will be no divorce for us.

This morning's Today program reported that the divorce rate in marriages lasting over 20 years has doubled in the last 10 years. How sad. Why? The answer is abuse - emotional, verbal and perhaps physical. In short, there wasn't much there to begin with.

In two weeks, John and I will celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary. (I can't tell you how we're celebrating since John may sneak a peek at my blog and I'd hate to spoil the surprise.) When I think back on our 30 years, I realize we will not become this Today program's statistic. I think about these 30 years in stunned astonishment, awe and thanks.

How did the time go so quickly? I can remember everything as though it were just a few years ago. The months leading up to the wedding and the overwelming welcome and kindness by John's friends and extended family. Our wedding day - the wonderful care John's best man, Carroll, gave John; the make-up session at Elizabeth Arden's and then having to wait around til the 3:30 wedding; the wedding itself - who could forget that? I think it still remains a topic of cocktail conversation and laughs to this day. The honeymoon at the Florida house we wish Grandmother never sold.

I think about our three houses...Larchmont, the tiny house up on the hill on Myrtle Boulevard. It was not a posh address but it was a cute, cozy house close to Carl's, the village and it was where Julie and Patrick were born. The three of us walking down to surprise John at the train station are warm, vivid memories that are as important to John as they are to me. We joined Larchmont Yacht Club and sat on the famous front lawn to watch John's new boat being delivered. We made friends who are still important to us.

Next was Madison where Heather joined us. We needed this stepping stone to add more friends to the "right hand." (You know the saying, "I can count my really good friends on one hand.") and then it was on to Killingworth where we discovered we needed two hands (literally as well as figuratively). Thirsty Boots Farm became our home, the place the children grew up, established their friendships, went to school, left and now continue to come home to.

So here I am....right where I want to be after an already rich 30 years....a wonderful house, three great kids and a husband with whom I hope I might get another 30 years.....provided he doesn't yell at me.

Comments (1)


darling kathy

What a beautiful tribute. I am going to send it to Seth and Elizabeth so they can see what marriage is really all about.

I love you all so much.

Lots of love


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